Call 651-453-0123 today for your FREE 20-minute sample coaching session. Personal Parent Coaching with Tina Edwards Feigal is available by phone nationwide, or in person! She also presents for groups of all kinds nationwide. Click on Events to learn more.

What is Personal Parent Coaching?
It's a one-on-one opportunity to hone your skills in applying Present Moment Parenting featuring the Nurtured Heart Approach with any child, any age, for whom typical parenting and teaching techniques have proven ineffective. These include children with ADHD, ODD, Tourette's Syndrome, Autism, Asperger's Syndrome, Attachment Disorder, Giftedness, and others who need extra intervention, but have no diagnosis.

How does it work?
After the initial 90-minute intake, 60 minute coaching sessions take place on the phone (or in person, if you live in the Twin Cities) at regularly scheduled appointment times. Two or more clients can participate on extension phones during the same session, and even if you are in different locations, a conference call can be placed to include both parents, or parents and teacher. In-person sessions can be scheduled by calling 651-453-0123 for appointments at Tina's office, 2233 N. Hamline Ave., Suite 212, Roseville, MN 55113 or over the phone. 

What will I gain from the coaching?
You will receive guidance on become a "success mentor", increasing your ability to:
-transform your own thinking about the child's behavior
-energize your child's/students' successes in a way that truly brings out their best behavior
-identify and praise successes that would not have otherwise existed
-steadfastly apply time-out techniques
-help the child to identify feelings, values and successes
-implement the credit system with creativity and effectiveness

What can I expect for long-term results?
Coaching can help you to:
-learn valuable techniques and apply them, whenever or wherever you are with any child
-gain a sense of peace and calm in the child's presence
-gain control over the classroom or home environment
-take pride in the fact that your child/student feels successful
-witness the child's dramatically increased sense of esteem and empowerment.

How much does it cost?
Coaching is reasonably priced at $175 for the initial 90-minute intake appointment, and $125 for subsequent hour-long appointments. Tina's office is at 2233 N. Hamline Ave., Suite 212, Roseville, MN 55113. Appointments over the phone are the same duration and price.  Visa and MasterCard are accepted. Education, child care, and mental health professionals can deduct coaching fees from their taxes as an educational expense. Many people use their medical savings (flex spending) accounts to pay for coaching, as well. Waivered services through county assistance also pay for parent coaching. A sliding fee scale is available.

How long does it last?
Coaching begins with the 90-minute intake, followed by a series of three bi-weekly 55-minute sessions, to help parents and teachers gain confidence with applying the approach. After that, it is up to you whether to continue with the sessions. Many people have found it helpful to continue receiving coaching, as it helps them to stay focused on using the approach. Coaching clients often re-start coaching after a year or two, when their children’s development brings new issues.

What are the coach's qualifications?
Tina Feigal is the mother of three sons and a school psychologist who holds a master's degree in education from the University of Wisconsin-Stout. Her years of experience include working as a school psychologist in the public schools, teaching college courses in psychology, and childbirth education. She has been trained and authorized by Howard Glasser to present the Nurtured Heart Approach. Please call 651-453-0123 to make an appointment for coaching, for a staff training, or for a child observation at school.

Goal Setting: Please fill this out and bring it with you to the first appointment.

Goals for your coaching experience may look like this: “I want to get my child to listen when I ask him or her to do something,” or “I want bedtime to be faster and calmer,” or “I want to improve communications so that my teen will feel supported and not have to oppose me every step of the way.”

1._______________________________________

2.______________________________________

3.______________________________________

4.______________________________________

5.______________________________________

The Initial Intake Session:
We will meet and discuss all your behavior concerns with your children. Even if you come to coaching to deal with one child’s behavior, you may want to discuss another child along the way. You call the shots, so whatever is on your mind is fair game. Most parents are anxious for change by the time they get to their first appointment. This session is an hour-and-a-half so that we have time to go over all the background information, and then I can offer you solid, hands-on techniques to use immediately.

Following is the structure we will follow with the sessions after the initial intake.

1. How Are You Doing – Really?

2. Progress Check: What have you accomplished since our last session?

Did you have a family meeting? How did it go? What have new child behavior you noticed? What have you learned? What has unfolded that will effect today's agenda, and/or your long-term agenda?

3. Work for Today: What is your agenda?

Sometimes we'll focus on long-range, big-picture questions, and sometimes we'll deal with immediate challenges. While the choice of each session's agenda is yours, part of my job is to help you keep the wider view that brought you to coaching in the first place: strengthened parent-child relationships, peace at home, and success in school.

4. What's Next? What will you focus on before our next session?

- questions for reflection (where is the rewarding "energy match" occurring in my relationship with my child?)
- action items (improving homework or bedtime routines)
- habits to initiate or strengthen (eliminating yelling and focusing on your child’s positives)
- outside resources, such as reading, or key conversations with teachers, occupational therapists, or physicians.

We create a series of possibilities together: I frequently make suggestions, but the ultimate commitment to specific choices is yours.

Making It Great: How To Get The Most Out Of Coaching

Here are some patterns that hold true for enough clients to make them worth sharing:

- The goals that bring you to coaching are vital to your success. Clear goals will assure that you get what you want from your investment of time, money, and effort.
- Keep track of your goals and
commitments.
- Decide in advance: "What do I want to get out of my session today?"
- Develop your ability to observe yourself with compassion, and without blame.
- “If you are confused, you are about to learn something new.” Be open and accepting of confusion, as it can lead to great things!
- Reflect on your experience so that you are aware of and can repeat the new things you have learned until they are habits.
- Be flexible with your ideas about “being right” vs. creating a positive structured relationship with your child.
- When you want help, feel free to ask.
- A complaint is often an unexpressed request. Please keep in mind that if you express your concerns freely in coaching, they can be dealt with effectively. I will never think you are just complaining or criticizing.

Parent Coaches Certification Training Journal – Lori Jorgensen

Friday, October 2, 2009:  Today we had our first session with Tina.  It was really a great day, and I got so much out of it.  I was glad I’d read her book and listened to the CD prior to this session, because then attending Tina’s presentation really helped to solidify a lot of what I’d read and heard.  All of the information was interesting, maybe not really all new, but presented in a great way and full of so many great examples to illustrate various points.  One of the things I really enjoyed was the KARE-11 video clip about Tina using the parent coaching techniques with a family and then showing a follow up with that family about 10 days later.  It was exciting to see how the techniques had worked and to see the enthusiasm of the parents.  It was also interesting to hear Tina’s comments about this experience and not knowing exactly what the outcome would be – but hoping for the best.  I could relate to that – so often we all just have to do our best and then hope for the best, and when it works, it’s a wonderful thing!    

Another one of the things I really enjoyed at today’s presentation was when Tina had two people in the group who had seen her previously when she was in Fargo share some of their experiences with using some of the parent coaching techniques.  Their enthusiasm was really contagious and made me even more excited to find out more about parent coaching.  Having them share their experiences also made the whole parent coaching idea seem more real and attainable as a goal for me as well.   I continued to think about all the information I’d heard during the day until I went to sleep that night.
  

Saturday, October 3, 2009:   I spent some time on Tina’s website today, reading many of the very positive comments from parents who have benefited from Tina’s coaching.  I noted that there are many parent articles on the site and I’m planning to go back and read them.  I ordered a copy of Tina’s book for my client (too bad I didn’t have money with me yesterday when we had class so I wouldn’t have to pay shipping charges, but oh, well) because I thought it would be helpful for whoever it is that will be my client to have that as a resource (and didn’t want to share my own copy since I’m still really assimilating all the info).  

Sunday, October 4, 2009:  Last night our son, Alex, called us for no real reason at all.  He’s 21, a college senior living in Minneapolis and attending the U of M, and just a really great kid if I don’t say so myself.  He usually calls us about once a week, so last night’s call was a bit of a surprise because we’d already heard from him earlier in the week.  It was about 9:30 PM, so I suddenly worried that maybe something was wrong.  I was relieved to find out he was just calling to say hi, tell us about the Gopher game that day, his own recent hockey games, and the two job interviews he has next week.  Whew!  I always thank him for calling and tell him I love him, but last night I said, “Thank you so much for calling, Alex.  When you call us, just to share and talk about things, I am so happy because it makes me feel like you want to connect with me.  You just don’t know how much that means.”  He said, “Hey, no problem, Mom.  I love you, too, you know.”  Oh my goodness.  I know he loves me, and he tells me so regularly.  But it really was a lovely way to end the day.  I am enjoying this heartfelt appreciation thing.  It feels so good to give it, and the results, so far, have been so, so, so positive. 

Monday, October 5, 2009:  Today I went to the NY Times website, printed out the article “Parenting as Therapy for Child’s Mental Disorders”, added it to my notebook and read it.  The article related a lot to what Tina has shared, and focused on the importance of parenting, particularly with children who have behavioral difficulties.  I really liked a quote by a parent interviewed for the article:  “…if you are willing to take on the responsibility of extra parenting, you can make a big difference”.  The other thing I really liked about the article is that two big organizations, the American Psychological Association and the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, are starting to suggest and encourage nondrug treatments (like techniques that focus on parenting skills) in addition to, or instead of, drug therapy.      

After work, I called a friend who has a 12-year-old son to see if she would be interested in being my “practice” client.  We had a long visit and I talked to her about Tina and the Nurtured Heart Approach as well as the Parent-Coaches Certification Training I’m doing.  We also talked about her child and some of the difficulties he’s experienced (he’s an intense, anxious, and most likely, very intelligent child).  She indicated that she liked what I told her about the Nurtured Heart Approach and agreed to be my client.  She wants to look at the book before we make our first appointment, and she agreed to think about some of the issues or specific behaviors she’d like to work on during our sessions.  I gave her the Nurtured Heart web address so she could find out more about it before we talk again.  We both have a really busy week coming up, so we most likely won’t get to talk again until next week, when we can both, hopefully, set aside time for the intake session.

Tuesday, October 6, 2007:   I went to the NY Times website again today, printed out the “With Mayhem at Home, They Call a Parent Coach”, reread the article and put it in my notebook.  One of the things I found really interesting about the article is that parent coaching as a profession didn’t appear to exist until a few years ago, yet now ads for coaching schools are increasing on the internet and in parenting magazines and enrollment in these coaching programs is also increasing.  Until I signed up for The Nurtured Heart Approach Parent Coaching workshop, I had never even heard of parent coaches before.  Maybe they’ve always been there, but I wasn’t aware of them.  Some sources quoted in the article expressed concerns about licensing and prerequisites for parent coaching and the danger of parents perhaps believing that they’re getting mental health therapy.  In my opinion, the parent coaching idea is a great one.  I believe that the person doing the coaching should have appropriate background and knowledge (I like Tina’s four year degree idea) as well as training in parent coaching.  I like the idea of parent coaches working with parents to help them reach their personal goals, and I believe, like some quoted in the article, that if you feel the parents (and/or their children) you are working with need more help psychologically, you should be ready to tell them so and help them find it.    

Wednesday, October 7, 2009:  Today I read the “Spanking Leads to Lower IQs, Study Says” article and added it to my notebook.  I’ve never been a fan of spanking and would tend to agree with the author (Straus), “that spanking may cause a slowdown in a child’s development of mental abilities”.  Although, as noted in the article, the only way to truly show cause and effect between spanking and “dumber kids” would be to use a methodology that is unfeasible (randomly assigning children to two groups – one group who would get spanked and one group that wouldn’t), I still found the study and it’s results interesting.  I completed agreed with the author of the study’s statements:  “Contrary to what everyone believes, being hit by parents is a traumatic experience” and “We know from lots of research that traumatic stresses affect the brain adversely.”   I still clearly remember the few times that I was spanked as a child and vowed that I would never spank my own child.  There were definitely times as my child was growing up (an active, intense little boy) when I felt myself understanding why and when parents might spank, but fortunately, I was able to manage the behaviors successfully using other methods, including diverting his attention and offering choices and consequences.  The whole spanking as a form of punishment idea seems to be very contrary to the Nurtured Heart Approach, and although it may offer a temporary stoppage of a behavior, it may also result in a desire to retaliate and/or fear (which may breed anxiety).  I much prefer the Nurtured Heart Approach, which stresses using love and positivity vs. fear and punishment. 

Thursday, October 8, 2009: Today I spent some time on one of the websites Tina recommended – sensory-processing-disorder.com.  Wow – this site is just a wealth of information!  I have been fortunate to work with several OTs  who have taught me a lot about sensory processing and sensory processing disorders, this site seems to put a great deal of what they’ve taught me into one neat package that I can go back and look at whenever I want.  One of the articles I read that I really liked was entitled “Sensory Processing Disorders: Through the Eyes of Dysfunction”. 

I was especially interested in this article because when I went through cancer treatment a little over a year ago, I had my very own experiences with sensory processing difficulties.  During my chemotherapy, smells that would ordinarily be appealing to me became overwhelming and made me nauseous.  Lights became too bright and on some days it was just way more pleasant to keep them closed much of the time.  Sounds were way too loud for me and even quiet voices seemed like shouting at times.  Having these experiences was really an eye opener for me, because it made me realize what children with sensory processing difficulties must deal with on a regular basis.  As an adult, I was able to understand what was happening to my body, knew what I could (and couldn’t tolerate), and I had the coping skills to deal with it.  Children with sensory processing difficulties, however, do not understand and need our help to understand their bodies and develop coping skills and insight. Identifying and treating children with Sensory Processing Disorders as early as possible can make a positive difference for them.    

Friday, October 9, 2009:  I’m continuing to practice heartfelt appreciation (When you … I feel … because …) with those around me and definitely feeling the positive responses to this behavior.  Earlier this week a student at one of my schools heard me do this when one of his peers had held a door open for me.  He then raced ahead to open the next door for me and beamed when I told him that I had so many things to carry and his kind behavior had really started my day off in a great way.              

View our calendar.

Interested in Becoming a Parent Coach?